The funeral
I wasn't there to see it. All my friends attended or so i'd hope, but not me.
I was busy. Having my face painted by some straight laced homosexual weirdo who was listening to Freddie Mercury, the music blasted from on a cd player in the corner. Not that i'm homophobic, some of my best friends were gay, I said were in the past tense because I won't be seeing them anymore and the reason this one, the one placing light rouge on my cheeks, the reason this one was upsetting me is because so far whilst I have been lying here he has received two phone calls, one from his boyfriend and one from his wife! The wedding ring is also a bit of a give away. I might figure out a way to out him. It would be difficult now given my circumstances, but, I will try, just give me some time.
Aaah, my friends have arrived, excellent. Shall we all go to the pub afterwards? How long before the conversation leads away from me and back to the norm? half an hour? half a day? for some maybe even half a week. That's it, half a weeks worth of memories for 78 years of work, sweat and toil. Laughs yes, but mainly when I was young. Love yes but again mainly when I was young. Regrets, I've had a few, but unlike ole blue eyes I have far too many to recall so I will not bore you with these griefs. My legacy, which I believe I said once in a thai restaurant to a rather pretty waitress who was serving another discontented old man, they were arguing over love and money, which gave more pleasure in this world of uncertainty. My quote was simple. Too much of both will destroy you, not enough of either will crucify you, but, a little bit of both can bring endless days of happiness without the pressures too much or too little bring. So there you have it. I am suited and booted and ready to go and I have shared a little knowledge to pass on to the world. Goodbye. PS, They should have buried me in some trunks, think it will be pretty hot where i'm going.
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